a ranting update

hi earth am back again!

so, short update again! hmm 5weeks had passed since baby enlisted! and ya, that's mean I have been rotting for 5weeks. went for the interview at mbs and till now, there is no news but I don't know why I still cling for that slimiest hope. all the adult have been nagging at me to look for a new job. sigh. I'm extremely broke now. bad daughter i know. Wanna further study but I know I totally couldn't get into any uni and I don't have the money to. work for now I guess. Please mbs, give me an answer soon! hate being left hanging in the air. and I regret going back to continue my car lesson. yep I change to auto already and have went for a few lesson. but I'm so broke already and have to keep lending money from parents ): TP on 15th aug! please let me pass! if I failed again, I guess i shall give up and never learn again till I'm super duper rich yea.

health problem back again. anemia again ): but right now, still don't have the need to go for blood transfusion. been directed to see blood specialist and it doesn't seem good for now. Have to keep going back hospital till they find the cause to my loss of blood count which I don't know it gonna take how long. they stated months and each visit cost like $100 - $300. money again. tell me how to come up w all these money. have been stressing over money every single day. but with my poor health, how the hell am I going to work? Ohmygwad I seriously feel damn helpless. hearing nagging everyday is seriously not helping. Not that I didn't try my best... I do want to work so much, but why doesn't seem you all understand? sigh. one side of me wanna work so much regardless of my health, another side of me wanna get back my health first. money, why you wanna come in between us. if only, money is not the issue at all.

Feel so tiny now. Wanna get back my weight! i'm like severely underweight! gwad, life why are you doing all these to me ): wanna get over all these, get a stable job, wait for baby to ord. all these seem so far away!

it's a friday again! and that's mean baby booking out day! can't wait to see him! miss baby treating me like a princess, chasing all my troubles away): Hi baby, I'm looking forward to every weekend with you and hating every sunday.