I want to update but my mood seem to be going on and off. Things are really bad for this two weeks especially with boyfriend. We have be quarreling so much in just this two weeks. You hate to quarrel, and I hate to quarrel too. But i seem to forget how to tolerant, how to be patient. I seem to forget how to be the usual me. I can't be that understanding anymore. I'm becoming so hot temper this two weeks. I'm treating you so badly. I can't be the one to console you when you are down too. I cannot be able to talk with you nicely like I used to be. I seem to forget how to be me. I'm turning from bad to worse. I wanna cry so badly, but I seem to forget how to cry too. Where is all the tears? I seem to be hiding all my feelings in my heart. But then the true is I'm sad and I'm showing all out. But it seem to be in a wrong way. Because I'm not showing out nicely to you. I don't know how to tell you and I just keep on showing you attitude and throwing you temper. I'm not like that before, and have never been like that. This two weeks of quarrel seem to be affecting our relationship a lot. Maybe you should know the reason which led to so many quarrel? But this time round, i can't be understanding anymore. I know your situation too, I know your feeling but yet I just can't be understanding toward you. But I'm really seriously extremely unhappy about it. I don't feel good about the whole thing. I don't know how to talk things nice when I'm in such a bad mood. My mood have been going up and down continuously for this two weeks. And during this two weeks, I'm have been feeling so confused about myself. People told me to trust you, telling me that you are not that kind of guy. But i just can't bring myself to trust you for that kind of thing. And how much you have said, it still can't convince me.
I seem to be picking you even on the smallest thing. I seem to be feeling angry over every word you have said. You think I like? My heart hurt whenever I did it. But I just don't know how to control my temper. That thing end. It will be the new week tomorrow. I hope i will not be like that anymore. I hate to treat you so badly. I hate to see you feeling so upset but yet I don't go and console you. I start to regret after what i have done. But the next moment, I'm repeating it again. Just ignore what i have said to you. I seriously don't mean what i have said. I just said out of anger and without thinking. I don't know why even thought that thing over already, I'm still very mind about it. I just don't know what's wrong with me. Just give me time to adjust after all these arguing and quarreling. My temper will back to normal soon. I'm sorry, b.
After all these, I still love you like how I used to.
You are a really important person to me.
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